Sober Decisions

Stop Blaming Yourself Overcoming Personalization and Family Drama

🧠 “You’re Not the Villain in Everyone’s Story” | Personalization & Recovery Short Let’s talk about one of the most mentally exhausting traps in recovery: personalization. Your friend cancels plans? Must be because you’re a loser. Family drama erupts? Clearly you’re the problem. Someone’s in a bad mood? Obviously you messed up. Here’s the truth: it’s not about you. People have their own lives, problems, insecurities, and chaos—and most of it has nothing to do with you. When you live honestly—when you walk in truth—you stop needing to run from every shadow of rejection. I’ve had to make some serious grown-up decisions for my family lately. I thought them through. I prayed. I talked with my wife. And guess what? My family didn’t like it. So now I’m the black sheep. That used to wreck me. The guilt. The shame. The feeling of worthlessness. But now? I get it: they’re reacting to their own discomfort, not my failure. If you're doing the work, making thoughtful decisions, and staying grounded—you’re not the villain here. You’re not even the main character in their story. Stop taking ownership of other people’s chaos. You're not that powerful.