Shadow Work
23 episodes tagged "Shadow Work".
Why your "help" is actually manipulation
Are you actually helping them, or are you just feeding your own "Fixer's High"? Let’s talk about the dark side of being the helper. 🧠🚩 Let's be brutally honest: when you operate out of this shadow side—especially if you identify as an Enneagram Type 2 or a chronic people-pleaser—your help isn't a gift. It's a covert contract. You get a dopamine and oxytocin hit from saving them, and when they don't validate your existence in return, you explode. That isn't love. That is emotional vampirism masked as charity. It's time to wake up and break the cycle. 💬 Let me know in the comments: Have you ever caught yourself making a "covert contract" with someone you were helping? Be honest. 👇 If this exposed a nerve, hit that LIKE button and SUBSCRIBE for more no-BS truths on psychology, shadow work, and real personal growth.
Buried Anger Doesn't Disappear—It Detonates
Here’s the part most people don’t want to hear—and I’m saying this because I care about you. Carl Jung warned us about the shadow: everything we deny about ourselves—rage, greed, selfishness, aggression. When you call yourself a “nice guy” or a “good Christian” while pretending you don’t have those parts, you don’t destroy them—you bury them. And buried energy doesn’t disappear. It detonates. This is why repressed anger explodes. Why people who look holy fall hard. Why holding the beach ball underwater always ends the same way—it shoots back up and hits you in the face. Psychological health and spiritual maturity aren’t about killing the wolf. They’re about walking the wolf on a leash. Integrating strength. Admitting you have the capacity to be dangerous—and choosing discipline anyway. If this hit close to home, like, comment, and subscribe. Share it with someone who’s tired of pretending. I’m Michael. This is Sober Psychology. Stay honest. Stay grounded. Go help somebody.
The "Nice Guy" Syndrome: Why You Are Secretly Manipulative
Are you exhausted from doing everything for everyone? Do you feel resentful when people don't return your favors? In this 60-minute deep dive, I'll expose the dark psychology of the "Nice Guy" Syndrome and People Pleasing. We aren't just talking about being polite; we are talking about how your "kindness" is often a manipulative strategy to avoid conflict and buy love. We break down Covert Contracts (the hidden agreements you make in your head), the Fawn Trauma Response, and why Jesus wasn't actually "nice." We also explore Locus of Control, the Extinction Burst (what happens when you finally say "No"), and why the "Nice Guy" strategy is actually destroying your dating life. If you are ready to kill the martyr, set real boundaries, and stop living for everyone else's approval, this episode is the episode you need.
Write Down Your Biggest Mistake Now!
💥 ONE way you sabotage yourself — WRITE. IT. DOWN. 💥 This isn’t some cute journal prompt. It’s your reality check. Grab a piece of paper — not your phone, not just your thoughts — and write down ONE way you keep screwing yourself over. ONE. “I procrastinate on everything that matters.” “I start fights when things are going well.” “I drink when I should be dealing.” Doesn’t matter what it is. Make it real. Seeing it on paper makes it undeniable. It’s no longer some fuzzy “I’m a mess” excuse. It’s a pattern. And patterns can be broken — but only if you own them. This is the first bite of the elephant, people. Not a magic cure, just the beginning of you finally showing up for yourself. So here’s your challenge: drop ONE self-sabotage move in the comments. No shame. No fluff. Just real talk.
Think You’re the Only One Struggling?
🔥 “Your Pain Isn’t Unique — It’s Human. Here’s Why Running Makes It Worse.” That breakup? The job loss? Getting ghosted by your Tinder match? It’s not life singling you out — it’s just life doing what life does. 📚 A 2020 study in Nature Human Behaviour found we way overestimate our personal misfortune. We tell ourselves, “No one could possibly understand my pain.” Spoiler: you’re not special — you’re just human. And that’s not an insult — that’s freedom. But here’s where you really wreck yourself: you run from the suffering like it’s a serial killer in a horror flick. You bury your head in Instagram, you binge Netflix for hours, or you drown it with booze. 🧠 A 2018 study in the Journal of Abnormal Psychology showed that emotional avoidance predicts higher anxiety and depression. You’re not outsmarting your pain — you’re just kicking the can down the road, and trust me: it’ll come back bigger and meaner. 💥 So, stop treating your suffering like an enemy. Face it. Use it. Let it shape you into something unbreakable. Drop a 🗣️ if you’re ready to stop running and actually deal with your shit.
Don't Let Your Demons Haunt You
🔥 “Turn Your Suffering Into Strength — Here’s How” Look — I know you feel like this pain is never gonna end. Like you’ll never get your feet back under you. I’ve been there. But here’s the brutal truth: any problem that feels like it’s swallowing you whole today will shrink with time and perspective. I’m not saying that cliché, “Time heals all wounds,” is perfect — but giving your pain space to breathe is what lets you see it for what it really is: a lesson. ➡️ Step One: Face It. Stop running. A 2022 study in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that people who confront suffering head-on — instead of numbing it — come out stronger. It’s called post-traumatic growth for a reason. You can keep pretending it’s not there, but it’ll just keep digging at you like a splinter under your skin. Or you can look that pain dead in the face and say, “You’re not the boss of me anymore.” 💡 Let your suffering teach you — don’t let it trap you. If you’re hurting right now, take a deep breath. Let it be big. Let it be heavy. And then remember: it won’t always feel like this. You’re stronger than you think. Drop a ❤️ if you’re done running from your demons — and ready to grow.
How To Find Real Friends Who Tell The Truth!
🔥 “Suffering Isn’t Optional — But What You Do With It Is” Look, suffering is part of the human subscription plan. You don’t get to cancel it. But here’s the kicker: you do get to choose what that pain does to you. You can let it make you bitter, small, and stuck — whining about the same wounds for the next 20 years — or you can use it to build a life that’s tougher than a $2 steak. How? Find your people. The real ones. The ones who say, “Hey, I love you enough to tell you the truth — here it is.” Not the yes-men, not the pity party crew — the tribe that’ll listen without judging and hold you accountable when it counts. It doesn’t have to look like some perfect sitcom friend group. It doesn’t matter if you meet around a campfire, at a meeting, or over FaceTime. Just find the humans who’ll sit in your mess with you, help you stand up, and remind you you’re not alone. I’ve been at rock bottom. Addiction, despair, shame — the whole circus. I’m only here because I stopped running from the pain and faced it head-on. 👊 So here’s your permission slip: Suffering stays, but you choose what it builds. Choose wisely. Drop a ❤️ if you’ve got that one friend who’ll call you out and lift you up. And if you don’t — time to go find ‘em.
Why Good Friends Make Stress Disappear Fast!
🔥 “Find Your People — The Ones Who Just Listen” Let’s get real for a second — your suffering doesn’t have to be a solo mission. You need people. Not the fake ones who slap a “praying for you” on your worst day and vanish — I’m talking about real ones. The ride-or-die crew who’ll just sit in the muck with you when you need it. Look, you don’t always need advice. Sometimes you just need a buddy to shut up and let you throw rocks into a lake. Or hit a golf ball. Or just drive around in silence. That’s it. They’re not gonna judge you, not gonna fix you, not gonna tell you you’re a piece of crap for feeling what you feel. They’re just gonna listen. When the time comes, those same friends will hand you the truth — the real truth — and hold you accountable because they love you enough to see you get better. 💡 Find your tribe. Whatever that looks like. Doesn’t have to be pretty or perfect or like some Instagram influencer’s “chosen family.” Just find the people who’ll sit with you when you’re broken — and remind you that you’re not alone. Trust me — a village doesn’t make your problems disappear, but it damn sure makes carrying them easier. 👇 Who’s that person for you? Tag ‘em or drop it in the comments. If you don’t have ‘em yet — time to go find ‘em.
Why Do We Hold On To Pain?
💥 “Stop Feeding the Monster — Why We Cling to Suffering” Listen up, Sober Psychology fam — let’s talk about the uncomfortable truth nobody likes to admit: sometimes your suffering feels comfortable. Yeah, I said it. Some of you were raised in chaos — confusion, pain, betrayal — and that chaos became home. So you cling to the hurt like it’s a damn security blanket. You feed that monster inside you every day. You become the pain. You wear it like armor. It gives you an excuse to stay stuck, to lash out, to not grow. But here’s the gut-punch truth: holding onto that suffering is poisoning you. I’m not saying you snap your fingers and it vanishes — I’m saying you learn to face it in a healthy way. Journal it out. Talk it out. Pray it out. Scream into a pillow if you have to. Give that pain some air to breathe — because suffocating it just lets it rot inside you. And here’s what nobody wants to believe when you’re in the pit: Whatever feels like it’s gonna kill you today? It’ll be microscopic a year from now. Not because “time heals all wounds” (cliché, but kinda true). But because time gives you perspective. And perspective gives you power. You don’t have to become the suffering. Let it teach you. Let it sharpen you. Then let it go. 👇 Drop a comment: What monster are you done feeding this year?
Why This Book Changed Millions of Lives!
🔥 “Finding Meaning In the Suffering — A Lesson from Viktor Frankl” Alright, Sober Psychology crew — let’s get real for a second. You want proof that suffering can be your greatest teacher? Crack open Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning. Here’s this man — a brilliant psychiatrist — who got ripped out of his life, stripped of everything, and thrown into a Nazi concentration camp. Imagine that level of hell: starvation, cruelty, death all around you, and zero guarantee you’ll see tomorrow. Yet Frankl survived by clinging to one radical idea: that there is meaning inside the suffering. He wrote about how people who found purpose, no matter how tiny — a memory of family, a belief in something better, a sliver of hope — were the ones who didn’t let the darkness swallow them whole. I hate that he had to live through that horror. But his testimony is this gut-punch reminder that pain alone doesn’t break you — your response does. Suffering feels like a cosmic joke sometimes, I get it. But Frankl’s entire message? It’s not about avoiding pain — it’s about transforming it. Finding a why when life dumps you into the darkest pit imaginable. Meaning is in the suffering. Write that on your bathroom mirror. Tattoo it on your forehead. Whatever. The fact that you can wrestle agony into purpose? That’s your human superpower. 👇 Drop a comment: What’s your “why” when life is kicking your ass?
Why Does Life Feel So Hard Sometimes?
🔥 “Suffering: Your Greatest Teacher — Not Just a Cosmic Middle Finger” Alright Sober Psychology fam — buckle up. I’m Michael — psychologist in training, sober dad, and a guy who’s wrestled enough demons to start my own WWE league. Today we’re going headfirst into the thing you’re probably drowning in: suffering. That soul-crushing, gut-punching mess that makes you feel like life is just one long “screw you” from the universe. Let’s cut the sugarcoating: You’re probably suffering right now. Maybe it’s your dead-end job. Maybe it’s your empty fridge. Maybe it’s your ex living their best life while you’re crying into a $5 bottle of bottom-shelf wine. Here’s the truth bomb: Suffering isn’t just a bad day — it’s a human condition. And most of you? You’re handling it like a toddler in a mosh pit — flailing, screaming, and falling over yourself. But you don’t have to. I’m here to break down: ✔️ Why we suffer (hint: it’s not because the universe hates you) ✔️ What psychology says about turning pain into power ✔️ How to stop letting suffering turn you into a whiny victim This ain’t group therapy with hugs and tissues. This is tough love with a side of dark humor to keep you awake. Stick around — by the end, you’ll see why suffering isn’t your enemy. It’s your greatest damn teacher. 👇 Drop a comment: What’s the one thing your suffering has taught you — or what do you hope it will?
Is Suffering Just Part of Being Human?
🔥 “You Suffer Because You’re Alive — Not Because the Universe Hates You” Alright, Sober Psychology fam — let’s hit this with the cold, liberating truth: Suffering is not optional. It’s not like a Netflix subscription you can cancel. From the moment you take your first breath, life’s throwing you uppercuts — hunger, heartbreak, and yeah… that time you trusted a fart in a job interview. (Never again, right?) The Buddha had it nailed: “Life is suffering.” But don’t roll your eyes yet — this isn’t all gloom and doom. Science backs it up too: A 2019 study in Psychological Review found that pain and fear are evolutionary tools — they’re wired in to keep you alive. Your ancestors dodged saber-toothed tigers with this wiring. You? You’re dodging your own bad decisions and coping mechanisms. So let’s get real — You don’t suffer because the universe hates you. You suffer because you’re alive. So stop treating your pain like some personal vendetta. That layoff? That breakup? That Tinder ghost? It’s not cosmic cruelty. It’s just… life doing its thing. Your job? Use it. Use that pain. Learn from it. Let it sharpen you, not sink you. 👇 Sound off in the comments: What’s life teaching you through your suffering right now? And if you don’t know yet — keep showing up. That lesson’s on the way.
How Facing Pain Makes You Stronger!
🔥 “How to Use Suffering as Fuel — Not a Life Sentence” Alright, Sober Psychology crew — let’s land the plane with Part 4: How to use your suffering to grow. This is where we stop letting pain be the anchor around your neck and start using it as ammo. Step 1: Face It — Stop Running No more dodging. No more pretending it’ll just go away. A 2022 study in the Journal of Positive Psychology found that real post-traumatic growth — that’s the good stuff, the part where you come back stronger — comes from confronting your suffering head-on. Read that again: Suffering is a teacher — not a life sentence. Next time you’re in the middle of that storm, pause and ask yourself: 🧠 “What’s this pain trying to teach me?” Don’t just feel it. Use it. All those nights you thought would break you — they can be the bricks that build you instead. Look, I should’ve let my pain crush me. It had me dead to rights. But instead? I weaponized it. I took the shame, the trauma, the wreckage — and I turned it into something that might help someone else crawl out too. That’s what you’re doing here. You’re not wasting your suffering. You’re making it useful. Why do we fall, Bruce? So we can learn to get the hell back up. 🦇 Be your own damn Batman. Every heartbreak, every relapse, every betrayal — it’s a stepping stone, not a pitfall. You are not doomed. You are becoming. 👇 Drop in the comments: What’s your suffering teaching you? And if you can’t see the lesson yet — don’t worry. Keep going. It’s there.
How I Turn Tough Research Into Fun Videos!
🔥 The Hard Truth: You Need an Outlet — And a Tribe Alright, Sober Psychology fam — real talk. This right here? This channel? This is my outlet. It’s me creating. It’s me doing something with my pain and experience so it doesn’t rot inside me like a festering wound. 👉 Do you know how much work it takes to pull these episodes together? The research, the peer-reviewed articles — (btw, if you’ve ever actually read peer-reviewed articles, you know they’re not exactly beach reads. I like ‘em because, well, I’m a bit twisted in the head — but that’s another episode). This is a labor of love. I’d do all of this, every ounce of it, just for the hope that maybe one person — out of twenty or out of two thousand — will hear this and decide to stick around for one more day. You don’t have to tell me. You don’t have to thank me. But knowing it lands with someone? That’s purpose. That’s fuel for me. Step 3: Build a Support System. Write it down. Tattoo it on your forehead. Suffering solo is rookie-level stuff. A 2021 study in Social Science & Medicine found that real social support actually buffers the impact of stress. Translation: Talking to a friend, a sponsor, a therapist — hell, even your dog — is healthier than bottling it up until you implode. So don’t do this alone. Your demons want you isolated. Don’t give them what they want. 👇 Sound off in the comments: Who’s your lifeline? Who’s in your corner when it gets dark?
What Helped Me Survive My Hardest Days?
💔 Suffering vs. Grief — And Why You Can’t Let Either Define You Alright, Sober Psychology fam — let’s get real for a sec. Suffering can be an incredible teacher — and so can grief — but only if you actually face it the right way. Listen, I know what it’s like to feel like your heart is so shattered that there’s no point in moving forward. I know what it’s like to sit alone in a dark room convinced that the only solution is to end it all — that you’re done with this life. And yet… here I am. Here I am with a 7-month-old baby boy who lights up when I walk in the room — who relies on me to feed him, to shelter him, to protect him. He’s gonna keep growing. He’s gonna learn to crawl, to walk, to run — and I get to be there because I stayed. If I’d listened to that lie back then — that my pain was permanent, that my suffering was too big — I’d have missed all of this. And here’s the kicker: Those problems I thought would bury me? Most of them don’t even register now. Half of them I can’t even remember because they were so small in the grand scheme. Grief and suffering are not the same. Grief is a different beast — maybe we’ll do an entire episode on that because grief deserves its own spotlight. Suffering can come from grief — but suffering and grief are not interchangeable. And here’s the truth: Neither gets to define you unless you let it. 🗝️ Your pain might feel huge now — but your future is bigger. Keep going. Stay alive. Stay sober. Keep your heart open. 👇 Drop in the comments: What’s one thing your past suffering has taught you that you’d never trade?
Why Do We Keep Going Back To Therapy?
🧠 Freud, Adler & the Brutal Reality of Your Baggage Alright, let’s break this down — therapist-in-training style. Yeah, you can argue Freud’s whole psychoanalytic model absolutely built a business plan: “Keep digging up your past so you keep coming back.” Meanwhile, Adler’s approach (shoutout to my psychology nerds) focused on purpose, growth, and moving forward — not super lucrative if people actually heal and bounce, right? But here’s the reality bomb — regardless of which camp you vibe with: You don’t have to carry your wounds forever. I still have memories I wish I didn’t. I still catch a grudge sneaking up on me sometimes. But the only reason I’m not the same raging, self-sabotaging, whiskey-soaked asshole I used to be is because I addressed it. I sat with it. I exposed those demons. I shined a damn flashlight in the shadow so they couldn’t rule me anymore. ✅ That’s not Freud vs. Adler — that’s just psychological truth. Trauma buried grows fangs. Trauma faced loses its power. So ask yourself: What demon do you know you’re still keeping in the dark? What’s one shadow that needs light? 👇 Drop it in the comments if you’re brave enough. No shame. Just growth.
The Secret To Feeling Better After Hard Times!
🗝️ “But My Trauma…” — Nah, That Excuse Has an Expiration Date Let’s get this tattooed on your brain: Your trauma is real — but it’s not your forever hall pass to keep wrecking your life. Yeah, life may have dealt you a crappy hand — trust me, I get it. I drank my way through a decade of denial, blaming everyone else while I torched my own sanity. But here’s the science slap: 📚 A 2020 study in the Journal of Traumatic Stress found that people who take responsibility for their own recovery — meaning they acknowledge their role in their healing — consistently have better mental health outcomes. ✅ It doesn’t matter what your past is. ✅ It doesn’t matter who hurt you. ✅ It does matter what you do about it now. This is consistent across the board. There is no study that says staying stuck in victim mode makes you healthier or happier. Zero. 👉 You are not your past. But you are damn sure responsible for your present. And you have the power to change what comes next. So here’s your gut-check: What part of your healing have you been avoiding owning? 👇 Drop it in the comments. No shame, just truth.
Stop Blaming! Unlock Higher Self Esteem and Less Stress
🔥 Hard Truth: Playing the Victim Is Just a Cozy Blanket of BS Let’s rip this wide open: You’re not lacking accountability because you can’t do it — you’re lacking it because playing the victim is easier. It feels good to wallow. It’s a warm blanket of “Poor me” that you wrap around yourself to dodge the cold reality that your choices created your mess. 👉 Write that down — it’s a keeper. There’s an actual study to back this up: 📚 A 2018 study in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that people who externalize blame — meaning they’re always pointing fingers at others or “circumstances” — end up with lower self-esteem and higher stress. Congrats. That’s the exact opposite of what you want, right? You want 🔥 higher self-esteem and 🧊 lower stress? Then you have to swap that victim blanket for some radical ownership. So here’s the question: Where are you still whining when you should be owning? 👇 Drop it in the comments. Let’s get honest so we can get free.
Is Your Trauma Holding You Back?
🗝️ The Shadow, The Scar & The Truth About Accountability Alright — let’s get real. You’ve heard me say it before: You can’t heal what you won’t face. That’s the shadow work, right? That dark corner of your psyche where the trauma lives — the parts you want to pretend don’t exist. If you’ve been hurt — physically, sexually, emotionally — that wound leaves a scar you’ll carry forever. But scars don’t have to fester. They will, though, if you bury them in denial. So hear me loud and clear: 👉 Your trauma is real. 👉 Your pain is valid. 👉 But your trauma is not a hall pass to be an asshole for the rest of your life. Capisce? Good. Now — let’s break down the psychology of accountability: ✅ Accountability = Ownership. Psychologically speaking, it’s the difference between “Yeah, life hurt me, so I get a free pass to stay broken” … and “Life hurt me — but what I do next is on me.” It’s not just saying “I screwed up.” It’s: “I screwed up — now here’s how I’m gonna make it right.” No excuses. No deflections. Just radical ownership and forward motion. 🧠 Shadow work + accountability = freedom. No more living as a victim to your own darkness. 👇 Drop ONE thing you’re gonna own this week — and what action you’re taking to fix it.
Why Your Past Doesn’t Have To Define You!
⚡️ Brutal Truth: Trauma Explains — It Doesn’t Excuse Look, I’m not speaking from a therapist’s ivory tower here — I’ve lived it. I’ve sat in that pit of shame, convinced I’d never be forgiven — hell, convinced I couldn’t even forgive myself. And yeah, my story’s got its monsters too: I was molested by someone hired to protect me. That wound is deep. But here’s what I’ve learned: 🧠 Your trauma explains your pain — it does NOT excuse your behavior. You don’t get a lifelong “be-an-asshole” free pass just because you were hurt. You don’t get to wreck your life and blame your past on repeat. If all you do is scream “Oh, my trauma, poor me!” — you stay stuck. No healing. No growth. No freedom. Just reruns of the same mess. This is tough love — because it’s the only way out: ✅ Name your wounds. ✅ Feel the rage. ✅ Get the help. ✅ Do the work. But don’t worship the wound. Don’t let it own you. You’re not a victim anymore — unless you choose to stay one. 👇 If you’re brave enough, drop ONE thing your trauma made you believe about yourself… and what you’re doing to break that lie.
Can You Really Blame Bad Behavior on Trauma?
💥 Trauma ≠ Excuse. Read That Again. Let’s get real — your trauma might explain your behavior, but it sure as hell doesn’t excuse it. Yeah, maybe life handed you a trash deck. I get it. I’ve been blackout drunk in my own pity party for years. But here’s the hard truth: you are not your past... but you are responsible for your present. Trauma is real. It scars deep. But if you’re using it as a license to be an emotional wrecking ball, you’re not healing — you’re hiding. 🧠 Psych tip: Emotional accountability is step one toward freedom. Ignoring your past doesn’t make it go away — it just lets it rot in the basement of your psyche. Shine some light on those shadows. It’s not easy, but festering wounds don’t heal in the dark. And I say this with love: stop being an asshole and calling it “coping.” Growth hurts. But so does staying stuck. 👊 Drop a comment: What’s one truth you’ve been avoiding that you’re ready to face?
What Happens If You Never Take Responsibility?
🔥 YOU CAN’T FIX WHAT YOU WON’T FACE 🔥 Yeah, I said it—and I’m saying it again for the people in the back. Dodging accountability doesn’t just make you annoying, it makes you stuck. There’s a 2017 study in the Journal of Personality that proves it: the more you avoid taking responsibility, the less likely you are to hit your goals. Why? Because you can't fix what you won't face. Say it again. Say it louder. Tattoo it on your forehead if you have to. You out here acting like your problems are a T-Rex—“If I don’t move, maybe they won’t see me.” Bro. They see you. They’re coming for you. And guess what? You’re not fast enough. No one is. Here’s your choice: 🏃 Keep running and let it all fall apart OR 🥊 Turn around, take one on the chin, and start rebuilding like a savage Either way, the pain’s coming. But only one path gets you free. This episode of Sober Psychology ain’t for the faint of heart. It’s for the warriors ready to stop blaming and start owning. Get in the comments and tell me: What’s ONE thing you’re done avoiding? Accountability starts here.
Breaking the Cycle Sobriety and Facing Your Shadow
⚠️ “You’re Not Just Quitting Booze—You’re Confronting Your Shadow” Here’s a raw truth from someone who’s lived it: When I hit rock bottom, I wasn’t just drinking for fun—I was drinking to numb depression. Every hangover made it worse. I'd wake up hating myself… then drink because I hated myself. That’s the cycle of addiction: a self-made loop of misery and self-destruction. And breaking it? That was hell—because it meant facing the monster without the bottle. Facing the depression. No escape. No anesthetic. Just raw, unfiltered reality. But that’s the first real step in recovery. And here's where we bring in Carl Jung. He called it confronting the shadow—the dark, unconscious part of yourself you’ve spent years running from. Getting sober? That’s not the end of the journey. That’s the doorway to it. The 12 steps? They aren’t just about abstinence. They’re about transformation. It’s not just quitting alcohol—it’s gaining freedom from the inner torment that made you drink in the first place. So if you’ve quit, if you’re trying to quit—you’ve already faced the dragon. Now it’s time to do the work. The shadow is waiting.